Up in Sarasota, Far away from Minnesota
sleepin' overnight there, gonna bring my only teddy bear
but in the form of Nancy's hair, overnight we shall stay
Interview With A Tree
Q: So how does one tree mourn for another tree’s loss?
A: Obviously by weeping. There’s a common misconception that only willows weep.
Q: What did you think about the film “Roots”?
A: I was offended. Couldn’t get past the title.
Q: Did you feel the same for “A Tree Grows in Brooklyn”?
A: No! No! No! That is completely different. That was one of the first. An absolute break-through for us!! You know, I have relatives in Brooklyn. Apparently they came from the South via a nursery in Long Island. Family tree stuff is interesting yet difficult to follow given our reproductive proliferation & irresponsibility. Some of us were just plain old nuts at one point.
Q: How do you feel about the attention the pines & spruces receive during the Christmas holidays?
A: This makes my sap boil. No comment.
Q: Recently I spent time at a Zen Monastery. There is a saying amongst Buddhists, “Chop wood, carry water”. Have you heard of this?
A: Yes. And it provides the answer of a prevalent violence amongst Buddhists!
Q: And what about, “Does a tree make a sound if it falls in the forest and no-one is there to hear it?”
A: I ask you this, "Does human flatulence smell if no one is there to smell it?"
Q: And what about the “Tree of Life”?
A: A fine example of what we call “treeson”. Some 'holy growers' somewhere started this one. Well, my time is up. I need to be pruned and irrigated.
Jersey City, NJ
Was It Something I Ate Or….?
Something has plagued me in the past year and I just have to get it out in the open. The topic walks the tightrope between carnivores and animal sex. I just can’t get over the fact that people who choose to do a little rub-a-dub with another species (i.e. dog, horse, pig, dolphin, chicken, weasel, John Ashcroft, etc) are held in great contempt by society and by our legal systems. I found that 28 out of the 50 united states of America do find it an offense of some sort, either a felony or misdemeanor, with jail time and fines.
Check out http://internetdump.com/users/akita/states-law.htm
for further details on this.
I find a contradiction in the fact that there are legal and moral retributions over sexual acts between humans and other species.Yet people congratulate each other over the fine taste and cooking of some of these same animals! If you’ve ever seen a human and an animal having sexual relations (aw c’mon, admit it!), the dog or horse or whatever the guest star is usually seems to be deriving some pleasure, like a good scratching behind the ear! Humans aren’t so bad to have sex with! This boy admits Homo Sapien preference, but I wouldn’t want to be eaten by one.
If given a choice between slaughter and sex can we safely presume which your own pet or grazing creature or penned captive would choose? Think of that next time you burp after dinner.
Things With Me
couldn't be better if i was a grandmother let's say knitting a sweater made out of leather for my son the bedwetter better known as lucifer's last lover but only under the covers avoiding the bother of the neighboring doctor who last was seen naked with the the governor's daughter sitting at the lunch counter counting their laughters while acting as targets for the sinister papers surely run rabid and i don't mean complacent but rather quite pleasant in appearance and odor all the way down the corridor sounding the silence as if it were fire and the water was words and we all swam together
THE EYE HOLE
THIS MORNING, A SUNDAY, I WAS FOUND OUT, CAUGHT, NAILED. THE EYE HOLE GAVE ME AWAY. I WAS RECKLESS. YOU SEE I HAVE THIS THING FOR THE EYE HOLE ON OUR APARTMENT DOOR. I LIKE TO KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON IN THE HALLWAY, WHICH USUALLY AMOUNTS TO MOST OF NOTHING. THIS MORNING I DISCOVERED A LOOPHOLE IN MY EYE HOLE. UPON MOVING IN HERE NEVER DID I INSPECT THE MECHANICAL LIMITATIONS OF THE MODEL THAT GREETED US. IT’S FROM BACK WHEN THEY REALLY MADE CARS AND REFRIDGERATORS. SIMPLE PHYSICS. THE EYE THAT LOOKS OUT CAN BE SEEN LOOKING IN. THE EYE HOLE’S BIOLOGY IS BUT A SIMPLE CYLINDER WITH GLASS ON BOTH SIDES. ON THIS SIDE IS MY EYE AND ON THAT SIDE ARE MY ARRIVING AND DEPARTING NEIGHBORS. A SWING CAP COVERING THE HOLE IS LIKE A RETINA OPENING AND CLOSING AS IF THE DOOR WERE WINKING AT YOU. CAUGHT RED EYED! SHE TURNED AROUND AFTER HER LOCKING RITUAL AND LOOKED DEEP INTO MY EYE HOLE. SUDDENLY MY LIFE BECAME A PSYCHOTIC ‘70’S MOVIE EXCEPT I WAS NOW BAD RONALD! NOW MY JOURNEYS TO THE BEDROOM OR BATHROOM HAVE A FEELING OF DISDAIN ACCOMPANYING THEM AND THE BURNT EMBERS OF BETRAYAL LINGER. MY EYE HOLE AND I SEE NOT WTH 20/20 VISION TOGETHER BUT ONLY DO WE SEE CLEARLY THROUGH HINDSIGHT. SHOULD I REMAIN PUBLIC AND CONTINUE WITH MY WATCH? THOSE LIVING AROUND ME WILL FEEL UNEASY NOW. ONE WITNESS HOLDS THE TRUTH, BUT IS THERE ROOM FOR MORE? I PACE, I THINK, I PACE, I TREMBLE, I WAIT. WHEN I LOOK OUT MY EYE HOLE I SEE NOTHING BUT GREAT CAUTION STANDING ALONE IN MY HALLWAY.
GREG DI GESU